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Vacation time
2003-07-04 02:20:06
It's finally happened. I no longer care. ^_^ I didn't to begin with, but I had a spat of doubt and motivated self-improvement recently. I'm very glad to have rid myself of that - far too time consuming. But I'm happy again, and it's about time I got back to what I'm good at. People have been sending more death-threats than usual, so I guess they'd agree I've neglected them. I even got one of those rare GW reviews...scary how long people will wait...the stubborn patience frightens me sometimes. And that one had been sitting for much longer than a year. It's just wrong. But I'm taking a vacation, so that's fine.
I'll probably still stop by the forum occassionally to check my inbox - just in case, but I don't think I'll start anything new for a while. I just need to get away from amvs for a while and focus back on my fanfiction. I think I've finished all my op exchanges, so I should be good for a week or two of absence. And after that run-in with EC (who *still* thinks I was trying to pad my scores to get a better rating >.< ), I'm going to have to either send private emails to people warning them not to review my vids, or give up altogether. I really don't care that much, but I *like* getting reviews, I've always adored feedback, and it's unnatural for me to scare off nice comments. It just feels wrong. I think I'm more likely not to worry about it now, though. If I *do* get a rush of 'unworthy' scores, I can always review myself and give 1's to even things out, so there's nothing to worry about. ^_^ I bet Dani would give me some 1s if I asked her to.
I haven't figured out where I want to go with my vids yet, but I think I need to just step back and think about it for a while. I never 'went' anywhere with my fics, except to my website and archives - and a few groups. I didn't worry about contests unless other people nominated me, and I've never been the sort to go out of my way to be 'better' than others. I just did what was natural and enjoyable and took pleasure out of sharing that with my target audience (those with the same interests as myself). It was soft and fun. I need to remind myself of how good that felt before I get lost in another bout of 'self-improvement.' And I think I've taken the right steps. I thrust my neck out, provoked the right person, received a nasty little chop, and managed to come out of it still happy with my vid, and most importantly, still burning in the pleasure of having something I love to watch. So it's good. And I can walk away with that until I get an urge to do another 'fun' video that *I* will enjoy whether it's synced the way vids are 'supposed' to be or not. And I'll be confident to use my own subtle style, whether that makes my work stand out or not - because *I* like it. And my ficreaders like it. That's more important than a thousand people on the org with their 'quality' issues and 'this is what makes a good or original vid' views. I just need to remember. This is a hobby. It's not meant to cause me pain, or to become a hassel or a worry. If I enjoy myself, I'm doing it the right way. ^"^ -
overuse = safe
2003-06-24 03:29:33
I wonder how many people get amv ideas and then go looking for overused songs to fit those ideas. I'm guessing the number is low, but I could be wrong. It's strange to purposely look for songs that are going to make people groan and flame and throw general tantrums the moment I announce them. But I find it's interesting, even enjoyable to hear the comments and complaints. And I preach the old 'use what you like, free choice' in amv making, so the least I can do is swiggle beneath the 'overdone-abused' category when possile. But it's still strange.
All the talk about LP and DBZ a while back and now all I can think about is those old vids I used to fill my little 6gb hard drive with, all those videos that I thought were so cool, the ones that introduced me to Linkin Park and general action. I still have a few of them that survived the March computer crash. I find myself watching them, wincing at them, and then seeking out new members repeating the same 'mistake' - just so I can see and point and comment. It makes me spend my free downloading time listening to the LP songs that I sought out after watching those vids over and over. And then I start thinking about my own vids, and the warnings and rants against LP amvs. It's no wonder I want to take those songs and use them myself. But I know better, I've given reviews warning about originality and overuse, surely I wouldn't do the same old thing. I would.
I found recently that there are a lot more amvs for YYH than I'd thought when I started 3 months ago. I'd seen 3 YYH music vids, all the ones that were up for download on the org, and I heard of 2 more that weren't up for download. But now I find they're all over the place. I'm amazed, and disappointed - I don't have the fandom to myself at all. And the general quality of the vids for this anime is quite high on average, much better than my old dbz downloads. So what does that leave me to use to my advantage? Strange songs, all the songs for the YYH anime - japanese that they are, but those songs require very good editing skills to do them justice. It's easy to say Hiei's theme song, sung by Noboyuki himself, will guarantee a good Hiei amv, but to do it...I lack that skill. I'm not at the level where I could do the combination justice. And unless I keep practicing I won't reach that level. So what should I do?
I use songs that aren't unique, I don't waste the good songs I've been holding for 'good' videos. There's no point wasting a song on a vid if I'm so poor an editor I'm going to end up with crappy sync. Yes, I know what's wrong with most of my amvs, though I didn't realize it when I made them. I still look back at my first batch of YYH vids and grin in embarasment. Would I take them down if I had the chance? No, but I'd warn people who download them not to expect much. I like having everything I've made together for judgement if anyone cares to do so - even the horrid mistakes (like a certain RK vid I murdered). So long as I'm not hiding anything, I feel like my gradual improvement is visible. I don't feel quite so hypocritical telling people to tighten their timing, to edit their longer clips - general things that even I have learned to spot. Do I catch the mistakes in my own work? I do now. But only because I made enough vids that I couldn't help but notice eventually.
Few people go out of their way to tell you where to fix things, and fewer bother to tell you how those things should be fixed. For me, it's a matter of trial and error. And for the trial I need songs, songs where it won't matter if I have mistakes because I could never have a trully good video with them anyway. Songs that are overused equal videos that are guaranteed to be flawed, if only because of the song choice. So it won't matter if the timing isn't perfect, or if there are other mistakes that keep the vid from being 'perfect.' And hence my thinking. I want to practice, and what better songs to use for practice than songs that are going to equal 'bad video' no matter how well or poorly I make the amv. Yes, I've been looking through my songs and listening to extensive LP, all the time thinking how each song would translate into a YYH vid, one aimed at Hiei. I've actually had some luck with this, but the decision has narrowed to two songs, one that would entail a strictly Hiei video, and one that would be my preferred Hiei/Kurama mix. And since I'm prolific, I'll probably do both. Ah, the LP-haters will have a field day with me, and I can hardly wait till the footage is ripped so I can get started. That's why I'm on here, to while away the time. And to wait for vids to download, of course. I'm seriously considering a DSL modem, just so I won't have to wait so long for things. -
Whatever...
2003-06-19 10:34:15
So, another journal. I do have one already that I don't write for, what's one more. And where to start, what to write...let me think. My name. My name is wrong - it isn't Arigatomyna, it's *Arigatomina* thank you very much. It really irritates me sometimes that I screwed up and got stuck with another spelling of my name - I already have three versions for my email addresses, and now I'm putting my amvs under a different version, really messes with the fic-readers. I have them trying to call me that, and after years of hard effort to get them to call me 'Mina or anything but Ari - I get Arigatomyna. Yeah, you can tell I'm bored. But anyway, I read a few journal entries and decided, heck, I'm bored, why not type until my eyes die, that's always fun. I read in someone's journal that he did a google search for his name. I hadn't thought of that, considering my vids are crap, they're new crap, and I haven't done anything to distribute them past the reaches of my website. But I went ahead and tried. Nothing. Of course not, it's not my name! Gagh! If I really wanted to, I could probably get Phade to change it for me, but the last time I PM'ed him and asked I didn't get a response. Guess he was sick of me having asked so many questions when I first joined - but I couldn't help it if Paypal was being a bugger and the site wasn't registering me...yeah...that's what I do in a journal, I gripe.
And speaking of griping, I did another google search for my real name - what an ego boost. That guy (not naming anyone) really knows his stuff, I'll be floating on this high for days. I think I may have to do that more often. I have more fics archived without permission than anyone should, pretty nice considering I haven't updated in like...forever. But that's fine, too. The longer I wait between chapters the more reviews I get, and the more death-threats, those are always good on the ego. Wish I could manage that with my vids, but it's not the same. A story I can let go for months with only one part to draw people in and keep them hanging. With a vid it has to be finished before I can upload it...definitely not as fun. And the hassel...yeck.
I hate my movie makers. How sad is it that I have to use 2 movie makers? It's just rediculous. And I can't for the life of me figure out why WMM won't produce vids in anything but huge avi format - files that are then inconvertible to mpg by normal methods. So what, I have to import the vid into Showbiz and produce it to mpg that way. It's dumb. And the website for WMM is useless. They tell you how to do things, but don't have a single link for asking questions when the things don't work right. And it's not like you can ask for help here, not when you're using a 'nasty' movie maker instead of the world famous 'Premiere' system. I really doubt I'm going to like that program. I've heard too many complaints about it, and all the work that goes into editing clips just to get them in a format the program will accept - it's insane. But I haven't tried it yet, so I don't know how much I'll hate it - good thing I won't know until after I've bought it, then I won't have a chance to choke myself with worry about that waste of money, it'll be too late.
Interesting thing, I got a review from someone with alot more opinions than me. I know, it's petty to count, but I thought I was doing pretty well until I saw his numbers and join date - guess I have room for improvement on that front as well. But it isn't easy considering how many vids I have - a day ruined on the connection time just to upload one, not considering the ripping time, let alone the editing - I still think I'm doing well with my opinions so far. And my usefullness is going up. I'm very glad for that, even if it is just a number. Ah, but I am so bored. It takes so long to download a vid, and then I've opinioned it and what...nothing to do until the next one is finished. I really need to get a higher connection. I don't have the patience for this. And I want to see what the new people are doing - but I also want to give ops to those who are asking for them and not receiving them (or getting crappy numbers with no details or pointers - that's so useless and rude).
It's very noisy downstairs, darn door keeps opening and closing, I hope she gets flies all over her office. Yeah, I'm renting the apartment above my mother's office...how lame is that? But I agreed to move here so she wouldn't have to worry about trashy people living above her, and the ones below my old apartment were almst too trashy to stand, so I can't complain much. It's just that she's only a few steps away (not including the floor), and I hate that. I feel like I'm back in highschool and sneaking out of the house to avoid her - she never visited this much at my old place. And I have to be quiet during the day in case she has clients in. How am I supposed to give accurate reviews for vids if I have my volume almost muted?! She says it's not important, though, and she's probably right. I spend far too much of my spare time on this, my newest obsession. It's nearly as bad as when I first started fanfiction - or when I started fanart - I want quantity first, then I want quality, then I want both and quite frankly I don't have the patience for it. I just want to make, and not care what people think.
And I have to clean out my email addresses. I know, totally change of subject, but my inboxes are both getting full (and I haven't checked the others so they're probably getting close to being shut down since it's only 30 days between logins). But it takes so *long* to copy and paste each review. And I can't just forward them. I tried that before and lost an entire email box full because I forgot to login on time. Really sucked. Any my mom wants me to print them out. I mean what's the point? If I need an ego boost I'll check my ffnet account, if I want constructive criticism, I'll read the fics myself. No point. And she doesn't know what sort of responses I get - death threats, update or I'll take you off my favorites list - nothing useful, no pointers on things to improve in the writing. I mean, most of my readers are 14-18, they're in high school! I can hardly expect them to give me writing advice, or to see when I slip up on my syntax. The best I could hope for is someone catching the typos and spelling errors, and people usually ignore that out of politeness or laziness. So whatever. Yes, I'm bored.
I'm looking at how many hours until the file is uploaded? At least five, maybe more. I wish I could use that xvid compression I've seen around. But with my movie makers and their stupid errors I'm doing darn good just to produce the avi and then mpg version. I could always use a smaller wmv, but heck, I payed for some space, and I'm willing to pay more for space, so why not use it. Besides, I like the vids better if the quality isn't crap, so much nicer than hosting the little 5mb versions on my group pages. Whatever, I'm going to bed. x_x
JOURNAL: Arigatomina
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