- Member: PeacefulSymphony
- Title: I will hold you up.
- Premiered: 2014-05-29
- Carlie Spiers (cover artist) Beside You
"And if your heart wears thin
I will hold you up
And I will hide you,
when it gets too much
I'll be right beside you."
In a long time, I haven't had what feels like a true friend, or true friends to me. And honestly, the concept of friends and friendship (and more so), actually having a friend and friends, means so much to me.
I think it means a lot to me, because in the past I have felt rejected and isolated, which has resulted in me becoming voluntarily independent since I have had to face certain things alone without the support of friends. And at a time in my life when I was younger, I was never really sure of who my friends actually were and if I had friends, and this is what lead me to making mistakes.
But in the time that I have gotten to know all of my precious friends, I can't help but feel like I have never been more sure that they are my friends and that they do care about me and are willing to help me and I admire and appreciate them for opening up to me and telling me their own stories.
It was very easy to put my emotions into the AMV while editing, actually. Because in the moments where the song describes the struggles and pain of the person (to me it's a person) I basically reflected the pain I have felt and edited it out in a way that I hope my friends will all be able to relate to. And at the time I had started to edit the AMV I remembered their own strifes and pain, that they had told me about.
I hope that through this AMV they will all be able to see how much they mean to me and how much I am willing to be there for them and listen to whatever they want to talk about or voice.
The song (to me) describes being there for and supporting the person who is struggling and throughout editing the AMV, I tried to show characters who I identify with, helping their friends or people who mean something to them. I also tried to use anime that my friends like and that I assume they are able to identify with, and also what I had tried to reflect upon on was how someway, all of them were there for me when I was struggling with something and how they were able to hold me up so much.
The clips in the AMV that have a darker kind of colouring effect, have that effect to emphasise the pain that the certain characters are going through and when other characters come along and help them with their pain, the colouring effect changes to a brighter one, in order to emphasise those feelings of friendship and reassurance and security.
Even though the AMV and editing as a whole was done pretty simply, I decided to use colouring effects on the clips in order to make the feelings throughout the AMV come more alive and to be shown in a more emphasised way.
For all of my friends' feelings of pain and terror, I simply cannot tell them how sorry I am and how much I wish I could physically be there to help them in someway. I hate to see people alone and I even hate it more to see them having to battle out their strives and pain all on their own, as well.
The one thing I want to remind all of my friends so much right now is that: no matter how many tears you cry and heartaches you endure, no matter how many nightmarish thoughts creep into your head and make you almost loose your mind, no matter how much stress and worry you may feel for yourself and the people around you. No matter how much it may feel like the things you want and hope for and your dreams are not obtainable at the moment, no matter how much hate and spite you may feel for people who get under your skin and no matter how hard it may be at the moment to be hopeful and prosperous and to keep your head up.
You simply cannot give up and you must try your best to keep moving forward. Because if you don't, then it is likely that you will never be able to feel alive and free again and you will be stuck with your head in the dark for more than you need it to be.
Recovery may take years and years to achieve and happiness may seem like it does not exist. But it does, and I cannot assure you enough that at the end of a very dark and deep tunnel that there is a bright, peaceful light waiting for you, calling you to come out and to face your demons and fears so that, you will be able to be happy and free once again.