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2002-06-05 09:33:27
---snip---
Amizadai (7:32 PM) :
maybe you erased that traumatic experience
evangelion (7:33 PM) :
you think....after the whole killing the fish incident*?
wah lau she did it with malice man!
evangelion (7:34 PM) :
on purpose to traumatize her kid...sick man
Amizadai (7:34 PM) :
hahahahaha
that was classic
but I don't remember it
do you?
evangelion (7:35 PM) :
no...
but when you told me, i was like WHAT?!?!
you said wally was quite amused no?
Amizadai (7:37 PM) :
No, wally is never amused by stories about abuse towards small children
For us small children are creatures that make the most interesting noises when you hit them, and whom you can bribe with sweets to make them like you again
Wally actually thinks they're small people
evangelion (7:40 PM) :
how cute....
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* The trauma that is called the "killing the fish incident"
One day, when my sister was 3 and I was 7, my mother emotionally scarred my sister horribly for life. She still laughs about it.
She was in the kitchen preparing fish for dinner, when she calls my sister from the living room where she was watching the afternoon cartoons.
Now, my mom has a talent for voices. She usually uses them for good, and not for evil, such as entertaining my sister and myself by making our stuffed toys talk to us. I, being the pracytical and slightly cynical one, always knew it was my mother doing the voices, but not so my sister, who at the tender age of 9 was still having lisping conversations with her "Doggie".
Anyway, my sister toddled to the kitchen, where she was introduced to Pescadito, or the "little fish". He engages her in some banal talk, asking what she was watching on TV, how he came from the sea and all that, when midway through the conversation, it gives an agonised screech. My mother, brandishing a knife, had made a couple of slices in its side (to better fry it later). "Aaargh! She's killing me! She's killing! I'm dyyyying!" it yowls most convincingly. My sister utters a horrified shriek and runs howling from the kitchen.
I run in to find out what the ruckus is about, and find my mother leaning against the sink, knife in hand and bleeding fish on slab, laughing like there's no tomorrow. "Oh, I feel so bad, I think I really scared her," she says, and continues laughing. At the age of 7 I was reading enough to know marginally about child psychology and the many myriad ways one can blame one's parents for trauma and other interesting stuff, so I yell at her. "How could you! You've traumatised her!" which of course sets my mom off howling again.
My sister and I subsequently forgot all about the incident, until my mother told us the story recently, her recount coloured with both guilt and high amusement. Of course my sister and I hold it against her now. Everytime we berate her for her evil mothering, we bring this up, which has the effect of making her dissolve into mirth. And then she tries to compose herself to deliver a convincing apology. "I'm sorry," she says, face straight except for the corner of her mouth, which is twitching hysterically. And then she drops the facade.
No wonder my sister hates eating fish.
I think I'm growing up to be as evil as my mother. People have started noticing it already. As one wide-eyed aunt put it after seeing me at play with a couple of cousins: "This Ami, she's very... ROUGH, isn't she?"
Little kids. Such pliable little minds, so fun to terrorize... -
"We must study hard so we don't let Spiderman down!" ~ Wally
2002-06-05 06:29:47
One more day to the opening of Spiderman in Australia. I can't stand it when I think how the rest of the planet has watched it already. Hey, I'm from the country that has the highest movie-going population in the world.
Everytime I see the Spiderman trailer on TV, I issue this awful keening sound that has people running out their rooms to see who is being murdered.
Yes, I know, I need to go out more. - 2002-06-04 07:34:48 everything is so postmodern
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Cook me a place at your table.
2002-06-03 09:25:32
Whoo! I am so so so broke. I am so broke it's not funny.
I am in debt, my rent is overdue and my bills are piling up. Not good.
People in my situation would be panicking, but I'm feeling pretty OK about the whole situation. For one thing, I know I won't starve, because I have yogurt in the fridge, a head of broccoli I'm sharing with the rats and a very indulgent boyfriend who would go without socks to make sure I get fed.
Failing that, I could go outside to the kitchen where my dorm mates are cooking dinner, lie on the floor and make pathetic mewling noises of hunger. That usually prompts them to offer me something. A chicken bone, sometimes an egg shell... Nah, I'm kidding. They're really nice and they usually cook me a share of dinner. But I try not to do it too often in case one day it earns me a kick under the table instead of a place at it.
I'm the kind who usually goes on a meal and a half a day (even when I have more than $9 in the bank), because that's the most my body demands of me. Besides my sedentary lifestyle, I put down the lack of appetite down to my schedule. I wake up too late in the day (or too close to the start of class) for breakfast. During the break I eat a late lunch, then skip dinner (because of the late lunch) and have a light supper at 4am in the morning. Usually a couple of soft-boiled eggs or ramen. Mmm... ramen. So lacking in nutrition and yet so tasty...
The funny thing is, I start feeling hungrier when I'm broke. It's fine if I don't think about it, but the moment I think "I'm so broke I couldn't buy a meatball if I wanted one right now!", my stomach gets all growly and tries to scrunch itself up in a self-pitying tantrum of hunger, which it hadn't felt before.
It isn't about being exposed to the sight of food, or people eating. It's the *thought* of not being able to buy what I want right then.
I'm not so poor I can't *afford* food, but I certainly cannot afford to give in to every craving. Normally cravings aren't an issue with me, but when I'm broke, I get hit by every single food-lust imaginable.
"I must have a mushroom omlette! RIGHT NOW!"
"Ohhh... I will die if I don't get an avocado in the next 15 minutes..."
"Mmmm... Heinz baby pear-mush. Nownownownownow!!"
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the idiot admin strikes again!
2002-06-02 11:11:16
I should probably be happy that my domain name is finally working with my hosted web space... but my host admin went and shut down my account and issued me a new one without telling me in advance. So all my files are GONE.
I need felt material, a needle, some string and a pair of scissors to make myself a Web-Host Admin Voodoo Doll (tm). And a wicked long pin. Or better, an ice pick. Matches. Lighter fuel. Blender. Or I could just chuck it into the rat cage and let Fuchi and Mirichi have their evil way with him. Yessss... I like that...
Fuchi: Hmm, I wonder what this is. I should probably pee on it to mark it with my scent.
Mirichi: Ooh, look, raisin eyes!
Fuchi: And it's insides are full of treats! I peed on it so it's MINE!
JOURNAL: Amizadai (Lee Amizadai )
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