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Another naps leads to a sleepless night...
2004-09-19 02:20:01
I did it again. This time I was lying on my bed thinking and pondering about my future. After about an hour, my thoughts started becoming little adventures no longer about what may actually happen, but would happen if something drastic occured. Things like, what if this certain person died, how would my life change? Or what if I quit school to travel around the world on my own? Or what if my friend really did win the lottery and did as she said she would and give me $50,000 to spend on anime? You know, things that will never happen, but it's interesting to imagine what my life would be like.
Anyways, by the time I spent around 2 hours doing this, and it was 10:00pm, I actually fell asleep. Mind you, this was not my intent. Around 12:30am, some of my floormates (residence) came banging at my door wondering what I was doing. They weren't drunk, but they definitely had been drinking. All my other floormates were either out partying or something, so these two were looking for the rest. I didn't mind. I have a policy that people can knock and come see me at ANY time of the day. Sort of like an open door policy. Besides, this time it proved beneficial because I was to wake up and get back to real life.
But because of that, I don't think I'll go to sleep again tonight. This time it could be useful. I could either watch anime again, or perhaps even do my homework like I should. lol The last time I stayed up all night, Thusday night, I watched the first DVD of both Excel Saga and Kare Kano along with a few other VHS tapes.
Kevin (Anime Jedi) -
Lack of sleep creates insecurity...
2004-09-18 14:01:07
Well, after being awake for 12 hours, then having my 3½ hour nap, I stayed up for the rest of the night, and majority of the next day. I fell asleep for 15 minutes around 1:20am last night. So I ended up being awake for about 29 hours straight, and basically only slept for 4 hours in 42 hours. Fun, fun...
Usually I'm fine during these little spurts of no sleep, but now that in University, I have a bit more to worry about. And I guess when your defenses are down like that, it's easy to feel insecure. I felt pretty lonely last night with all my friends gone. You see, everyone's gone home for the weekend, and I decided to stay here. I didn't see a difference, because I've been one of the only people who hasn't really felt homesick. But the main reason why I didn't go was because my girlfriend (3 hours away) wasn't going home either, so I decided to "spiritually" stick around with her and not go home. But here's the kicker. The reason she wasn't going home was because her family is visiting her! So now I don't even get to talk to her until Sunday night. I feel a bit betrayed. I know she didn't mean to do anything like that, and she kept telling me she wasn't going home, but she never mentionned her family going over there. So in other words, I purposely didn't go home to share her pain, and yet now I'm here left in the cold.
Anyways, I was really bummed about that yesterday. Worst part was that when feeling like this, I simply wanted to talk to her for a bit since I'm not used to this feeling, but she had to go to sleep so she could meet her family the next morning. So I was given the pleasure of wallowing around for a bit. I know she didn't do anything, but I just feel isolated now, since I basically cut myself off from everyone so I could be with her, and now that she's gone, I have no one.
But like I predicted, a good night's rest cured most of those feelings of insecurity. ^_^
It's funny, when talking to her on MSN, I only made like one ^_^ (smiley), which is totally odd for me, since I usually have one like everyother sentence. I was wondering if she was going to notice. It was definitely subtle but it was the only way I could try and tell her that I wasn't feeling so great without saying it directly and worrying her. She never picked up onto it. That didn't help with my mood, since it was like me saying "I need to talk to someone" and she saying "Sorry, I got to go". If it was that important, I should have just told her. I pulled a Yukino Miyazawa and was relying on others to notice so I wouldn't have to do any work (I actually just watched the first DVD again two nights ago). lol
But like I said before, I'm felling cheerful again. ^_^ And we're going to keep this between the two of us. Because telling her would only make her worry. Besides, she's coming to visit me in one week, so if I really want, I can go ahead and get emotional then. ~_^
Kevin (Anime Jedi) -
My longest nap ever...
2004-09-17 00:19:29
I got back from class at 5:15pm. I talked to my brother for over an hour, since it's his birthday today (yesterday by now). I quickly ran downstairs to get something to eat. I came back, ate watched some television, and slept until about half an hour ago. It was like a 3 hour nap. I've never slept that long unless it was for the whole night! Hmmm... perhaps that's what I'll do tonight. Why go back to bed when I've always gotten a decent amount of sleep... ~_^
I hope my girlfriend isn't taking this the wrong way, but what I've been doing is slowly weining (sp?) my way off the amount of time I talk to her and so on. Not that chatting everyday is a bad thing in the least, it's just that I have to realize that because we're both in different Universities about 3 hours apart, we're going to end up seeing and hearing much less of eachother once the work load starts building up. And the last thing I want is for us to all of a suddent stop talking (due to school work), and both start wondering if there's something wrong on the other side of this relationship.
I recently bought the Excel Saga DVD box set. Weird anime. I've only seen two episodes, but so far it's only been ok. But I'm sure as it goes on, it will grow on me. I just have to keep that in mind whenever I try to introduce this anime to someone, that it's going to take some time.
Kevin (Anime Jedi) -
One month of joy...
2004-09-14 01:03:50
Today is my one month anniversary with my girlfriend. Ok, so some of your prbably think that one month is nothing. And I have to admit, one month is definitely a terribly short amount of time. But it's always nice to take a moment to remind ourselves of all the time we've spent together.
Anything else new? Not much. The Toronto International Film Festival is on right now, and some of the shows are here on my campus in the Ryerson theatre. Today was supposedly the premier of Haven with Orlando Bloom showing up. And tomorrow we're supposed to get a Sharks Tale premiering too. Talk about awesome!
Unfortunately I still have work to do, so I've got to go.
Kevin (Anime Jedi) -
New anime shows...
2004-09-11 02:08:34
Three new anime shows premiered tonight. Gundam Seed, SD Gundam and Witch Hunter Robin are the new shows. All three are interesting, but I think I may only start following Robin. Seed was cool, but nothing too original. And SD was definitely new, since it looks like a cel shaded video game, like the Legend of Zelda: Windwaker. lol
I decided that this weekend I won't go home. I'll take it easy around here for the time being. I'm so tired, just because there's been so much running around and getting ready for certain classes. I had to spend just under $600 on books the other day, and I still have quite a few books left to get.
This morning I almost missed the class. I woke up very late, since I was up very late last night. I was going to sleep around 4:00am, and was considering just staying up, since trying to wake up after only 3 hours of sleep is almost impossible for me. But I decided on sleep, and had to deal with the consequences. Luckily my neighbours woke me up before heading out themselves, so I woke up at 7:55am, and was in class by 8:00am. I dislike these early morning classes. And to think, some schools like U of T don't even have classes before 9:00am. Lucky them.
Kevin (Anime Jedi)
JOURNAL: Anime Jedi
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