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hiya there
2005-03-04 22:27:53
Hi hope people are still readin this. If you are TANKS! I have a new fav singer it is alizee it's all in french but even though I don't know what she is sayin I still like it hehe
well milk-chan is busy on chapter one of the sequel YAY! lol
I've been kinda sickish lately don't know why. And NO I know I am not pregnant you have to do something to become that way lol and I havn't.
Oh wells I seem to be spinning out alot of poetry lately it's cause of ryan-chan (blushes) he is my love and muse
Oh wells I havn't been taking my seroquel and frankly I don't think I need to anymore brian is kinda mad but I lied (not happy about doin that) and said I would take it till I could talk to my doc which I have an appointment with him monday and I'm gonna ask him to take me off of the med I no longer need it.
Oh wells I need to get goin I don't feel well today.
kisses
chow
leala ann -
hi hehe sorry I havn't written in a while
2005-03-03 22:42:56
I'm SO SORRY! (bows repeatedly) I just have been SO busy :-( but anyways if you wanna know how I look and how vannie looks (my daughter) then check out my web site at leala.zoomshare.com it's on the bottom of the first page then alot more on my pics page in the photo album named my family. I have tooken off the original pic of me it was horrable hehe.
I well (blushes) I'm actually in love heheeeeeee with ryan-chan heheeeee
But anyways all my poetry and the matchin pics are also on my website and now also on fictionpress.com please check them out! anyways my plan for my family is now working a little my sister came over today to pick up my neice. I was so happy that my rents decided to pick my neice up I am sure they both missed eachother. :-) anyways but my mom is worse than ever (sighs) me and my dad know that one day she is gonna have a flash back and never come back that saddens me beyond all beleif. I want to cry about it whenever I think about it.
But anyways I need to go get some sleepies. I am feelin kinda sicky so I hope to write again soon.
kisses to all
chow
leala ann -
yawn yeah I'm still up it's about 10 am here
2005-02-23 10:56:21
ok quick entry my plan is gonna take longer than just one day (heavy sigh) but I'm not giving up!
My new im friend is great we really connect on many levels. oh latin if you are reading this im me tonight I have some advice for you. Another funny person is iming me thinks he is smart wanting me to call him master cause of my name LOL He doesn't even know me or how I am just knows my name and what is on my web site LOL He is tryin to scare me but what he doesn't know is I don't scare easily LOL oh wells I have stopped posting on that poetry forum for personal reasons so I have most of my poetry on the site allpoetry.com most even have pics to go with them. I wrote three new poems they are on there under my name slave 4 anime they are actually kinda uplifting a BIG change for me I know lol. check them out they are good. wells finally posted chap 12 on blood month.
sooooo tired gonna go to bed now
kisses to all
chow
leala -
yes it is now around 6am and I am still up
2005-02-22 07:28:22
yeah I know I should be sleeping now but I have a few things I need to get off my chest and I havn't written you guys in well two day sorry? anyways just got done iming a friend it's nice to talk to someone who isn't brain dead lol I took another iq test and here is what it said
We are confirming that your IQ Test score was: 137
Compare your score:
Intelligence Interval Cognitive Designation
40 - 55 Severely challenged (Less than 1% of test takers)
55 - 70 Challenged (2.3% of test takers)
70 - 85 Below average
85 - 115 Average (68% of test takers)
115 - 130 Above average
130 - 145 Gifted (2.3% of test takers)
145 - 160 Genius (Less than 1% of test takers)
160+ Extraordinary genius
yay I'm still smart but to tell the truth I kinda guessed on some of the questions hehe anyways on to other stressful things my internet hasn't been working all that great (heavy sigh) I hope I am able to get on later today but that is not what I am stressing over
My family seems to be falling apart before my eyes! My brother is extremely depressed over girl problems and well my parents and my sister are fighting and yeah they do fight sometimes but this is really serious it's mainly over her ex no good (edited for people under 18) and well he keeps coming in and out of her life and well to make a long story short she let's him even though at one point he threatened to nock her teeth out he literally said this and she was 9 months pregnant with his baby! it came out when she was three weeks from labor that he had been cheating on her for almost four months (bleep bleep bleep) we all thought she was done with him but she still caters to his ever need. My dad got wind of what he had said about two or three days ago he was beyond pissed and called her up and said that as long as that (bleepin bleep) was still in her life then my dad wasn't going to be in it. I have talked before how my parents have broken down infront of my eyes crying over how he uses her and how she lets him. But this time my dad is serious my mom doesn't want any part of my sister as long as that (bleepin son of a bleep) is around. But I can see it in my mom's eyes when she talks of my neice and nephew how it hurts her to give up. but it seems that is all they CAN do. I don't know I stopped giving my sister advice concerning well HIM because that was the little but of advice she would never follow. I am going to make a trip out there later today to talk to her and mainly to see the kids make sure they are ok so I can slyly come back and slip a lil reassurance to my mom. My mom on the other hand had been doing well with well with her mind stuff she was slowly recovering but now she is getting to feel the stress she is now in a alomst full blown mania wall papering the walls and such. I want to fix the crack forming in my family before it becomes a gap. But I will try my best and hope that god helps me in some way. wish me luck all I am walking strait into the line of fire holding a small white flag just hope I don't get shot down hehe
on a lighter side my dad broght me home some valetines flowers he shyly said sorry for them being so late but I hugged him and told him I was just happy that everyone was there to atleast see valetines day. His eyes started to tear up and he excused himself to the bathroom. I love my dad even though we used to literally fight non stop when I was younger it seems that almost dieing brought everyone not only myself out of the fog of ignorance. but now it is rolling back in and I HAVE to stop it and remind everyone what is really improtant. (heavy sigh) I am very worried though my sister can be pretty stuborn when it comes to HIM and well I can slightly understand. anyways oh something else I wanted to talk about
My problems with people (deep breath) ok I am going out on a limb here and I'm gonna tell you why I have such a problem with people. Yes I know you are all thinking it's cause I was raped but no that was when I was 12 but about four years ago it almost happened again. A guy I was with came over late one night I answered the door a blanket wrapped around me hehe I was naked but it was summer time and he didn't know that anyways he basically invited himself in and tried to convence me to have one last fling with him I said I really didn't know but he didn't really care I can't really call it rape because after a while I just gave in and laid there waiting for him to finish and when he did he kissed my forhead and said "It was fun" and left. I lay there for hours just staring at the ceiling until finally I passed out and fell asleep. I was weak anyways because my morning sickness had started yes I was two months pregnant with savanna. At first I didn't really have a problem being around people but after my accident I am more well afraid I guess I am alot weaker than I used to be and it kinda scares me. When I do go somewhere I know there are going to be alot of people I like someone I know to go with me or to atleast be there waiting for me. No I have delt with my past but I can't help but be a little scared after all it is a boring town with alot of bord people. I find if I am around people pretty constant I slowly become more independant but lately I have been kinda issolating myself and well it doesn't go well. When I do go out by myself I go to the same places where I know the workers and stuff kinda like a saftey net you could call it. I used to love being around people and I still do but sometimes I just can't help but cringe a little and everyonce in a while I have a little panic attack but nothing like at group last week. that was a full blown panic attack :-( but anyways I am going to try harder with people and try and not be so cowardly hehe
oh one more thing I am thinking about having a party getting the old group together probably play some spaids and drink a lil it will be fun and I know them so I feel safe with them.
oh wells look it has been 25 minutes!! hehe oh and I finally finished Dio's curious! yay I don't know if they will like the ending but it leaves tons of room for milk-chan's sequel. why do I have rape scenes in there? well because I am sick that's why Mwahaha! oh and as soon as my beta is done a new chapter of blood month will be posted yay now all I have left to do before I go to sleep is post my new poems oh and one more thing kinda wierd I have been DREAMING! yeah I know I don't ever dream but latly I have been and their not good dreams but not bad either they just seem so intense and stressful even if I am dreaming about shopping hmmm oh wells
kisses to all
chow
leala -
wow I'm smart hehe
2005-02-20 07:01:31
ok so I didn't go to bed yet but I did get a pop up and took an iq test I scored a 115 so here is what it says
The Classic IQ Test
What's Your IQ?
Congratulations, Leala!
Your IQ score is 115
This number is based on a scientific formula that compares how many questions you answered correctly on the Classic IQ Test relative to others.
Your Intellectual Type is Precision Processor. This means you're exceptionally good at discovering quick solutions to problems, especially ones that involve math or logic. You're also resourceful and able to think on your feet. And that's just some of what we know about you from your test results.
How does your score rate in your state? The average Tickle IQ score for people in Illinois is: 113.
Sample Report
In your IQ Report:
A summary of your intellectual strengths from certified staff PhDs
How your IQ compares to others
Average Tickle IQ scores by state
Charts and graphs of your results on 5 intelligence scales
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ok so that is what is says I'M SMART! hehe I told you so and this proves it I always did score really high on those tests in school the acts was it? hmm oh wells it was somthing like that yay I'm smart hah take that people who thought I was a ditz!!! WHO'S LAUGHEN NOW!?! HUH WELL IT'S ME CAUSE I AM SMART OH YEAH SMART ok that's enough of that oh wells I am SO tired now gotta go sleep but hey don't forget I will be dreaming smart dreams now lol OH I FORGOT! I have been dreaming lately it's so wierd cause I don't really ever dream but well I have been and last night it was about shopping and low and behold I got a check in the mail today! yeah very wierd and the one before that I don't remember but it was scary hmm that is bad cause the other day my dad said he tried to wake me up but I said I couldn't cause I was having a bad dream and well I don't even remember having it little alone talkin to him hehe anyways gotta get to bed now YAWN!
kisses
leala
JOURNAL: slave 4 anime (Leala scott)
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