JOURNAL: DemonessofDesire (Kathryn Wouldn't you like to know)

  • New AMV made! 2004-11-06 12:04:27 YAY! I am soooo proud of myself! Is this what a new AMV feels like? It's my very first! Yay! I am sooooooo happy! I'm gonna cry~! 
  • So Bummed... 2004-08-04 22:20:05 You know what? I have been in a crappy mood lately. Ever since my BF left for home, I've been depressed and lonely. All I get my good moods out of is my friends and AMVs... It sucks with a capital S. Anyways... I better get to uploading my AMVs... 
  • New Day Approaches... 2004-07-14 18:58:13 As the moon gives way to day,
    Mixed emotion dwell with me I cannot say.


    It's strange but ever since today began I have been in a strangely great mood. Probably because my friends have been supportive of me this week. Only two more days before my boyfriend comes. I'm worried and completely nervous. I don't know what I'm going to where. I mean, I know first impressions are everything and all, but this is just completely nerve racking. I don't know if he'll think less or more of me when he first sees me which is why I cleaned the house twoce today, not sure if I had already cleaned it. And if I did, I wanted to make it cleaner. I don't know if I had a perfectionist moment or not, but it's weird. I don't know... but anyway... I'm gonna go and download AMVs and put up my new story chapter...
     
  • You know.... 2004-07-06 19:06:29 DemonessofDesire lay face down on her bed, scratching letters into her journal. She sighed and couldn't help but feel like no one cared. She decided that since she was a new member she could give them some more time.

    Dear Journal,

    I only joined yesterday and already I'm getting peeved off due to the fact that I cannot download a decent friggin' Fruits Basket AMV. You know, it would be nice if not all of the Fruits Basket AMVs were local downloads. Those really tick me off. Because newbs can't download them and I don't know how long it'll take for me to be able to get a local download. Sometimes I wish I could escape from my house and just disappear into an anime series or a manga and become one of the characters and let people turn me into a AMV or something like that. I wouldn't care, because I would be an anime character and be admired. But that sort of life lives and thrives only within my mind. Everyone always tells me I'm an angel sent by God.... at least those superiorily close to me tell me that. I am admired by people for my writing talent, and my artistic talent but a lot of times I can't help but feel depressed. So many people ask me how I got to be so well off with my talents and I tell them talent. For some reason, I don't like being complimented. I just don't. I don't like people calling me a princess or an angel. It's like cursing me with e hex or bad luck or something. I just can't take it. I know I don't have a mental problem, because I know I don't. I don't act retarded or anything, I am just not used to being called such things, or complimented so graciously. I am no angel or princess, I get dangerously jealous when someone is better at something than me and I always want to improve. But I always compliment them and tell them how nice it is. I try not to be too friendly or too distant from people. I mean, I know I probably sound selfish talking about myself all the time, but I almost never do that outside of the internet. Like it says in Fruits Basket, it's human nature to act selfishly and think of one's self almost all the time. Humans are born with selfish desires. They dwell on them until they are taught otherwise. If they are. Okay... I think that is enough of my ranting. I need to tend to my Yuki posters... 
  • Completely Frustrated 2004-07-06 18:37:48 DemonessofDesire lies on her bed and stares at her ceiling, completely staring into oblivion. She thinks to herself how she is getting frustrated because she cannot make her own anime music video and still enjoys watching what others make. Yet, she has not found a single downloadable Fruits Basket AMV. She closes her eyes and thinks of what Hiei or Yuki would tell her in this sort of situation. "To maim... or not to maim... that is the question..." While she imagines the two Bishonens fighting over this topic in her mind she hums a tune that she thinks would be splendid for a Yu Yu Hakusho AMV. She thinks of how her beloved lord Youko would be there with her soon and buy her the entire set of Fruits Basket. At this she smiles and blushes to herself. She adored him so very much, almost as much as Tohru admires Kyo. Yet, she grows frustrated imagining how it will take eleven days for him to get there. Perhaps she could give someone her AMV ideas to make her feel better. It's not like her mind was limited in the creativity department, and over the months she has gathered so many ideas with so many songs. Oh well. Hearing her mother call her for supper she hopped off her bed and set aside her worries for the moment. She would write a complete entry in her journal later.... 
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