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Whoops
2002-06-17 22:30:13
http://www.animemusicvideos.org/video.php?v=8829
That should work.
And I mis-linked my video in my last journal entry. Whoops again. -
Double Cross video is up!
2002-06-17 21:51:59
http://www.animemusicvideos.org/video.php?v=8829
My newest video, with Jin-Roh set to "Friend is a Four Letter Word" by Cake. The song just fits the movie TOO well, as you would know if you had seen Jin-Roh (I suggest you do).
And my other video is up, my first one, which had been down for a long time. Finally on a reliable server!
Leave some comments or feedback PLEASE, so I don't make the same mistakes in the future. -
Guess Who's Back...
2002-06-14 00:32:47
Wow, what a busy week.
Friday: Wrote that last journal entry.
Saturday: Gradjeeated. Drove around, all over the place, with no specific intent. Went to graduation parties, where I proceeded to be abnormally social and even PLAYED OUTDOOR SPORTS! I'm beyond sunburned, STILL. Went to Buttface's uncle Marty's house and played videogames before watching the Tyson/Lewis fight (Tyson's a big ole' pansy nowadays, I tell ya). Spent the night.
Sunday: Drove around more. Stopped at Marty's mother's house in Edgewood and ate dinner after dropping Buttface's uncle Steve off at his house RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET FROM WHERE I USED TO LIVE 7 YEARS AGO. Got drunk at Marty's. I think. I don't even know what drunk is since Saturday was my first time. I felt fine, just a little dazed/buzzed, and I remembered everything, didn't make an ass of myself (actually got MORE intelligent, social, and made many witty comebacks and burns), didn't feel sick, and didn't have headaches or the urge to vomit the next morning. It took me 7 Bud Lights to get that buzz (or maybe it was drunkeness), I hear that's pretty good for a first time. I stopped at 7, I didn't want to lower Marty's opinion of me the first time I met him (second time, whatever). Watched Buttface and Marty play Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance and stepped in occasionally in Buttface's place while he went to the bathroom or whatever. Spent the night again.
I think I told a couple people I got drunk Saturday. Sorry, I forgot, it was Sunday.
Monday: Recovered from Sunday, got my sunburn slapped countless times by Buttface, finally left Marty's. Went to Best Buy in Bel Air and picked up Cake's "Fasion Nugget" cd, Alkaline Trio's "From Here To Infirmary" cd, Eminem's new cd, and Jin-Roh on DVD. Went to driver's ed, got another hour of driving on my permit. Sat around, watched TV, surfed the net everywhere besides the forums I usually go to. I saw a thread in one of those forums about the people there being afraid I might be dead or something while my sister was on it, and it sort of touched me in a way. I watched Jin-Roh later that day, and I thought, "man, I can't make anything out of that. I just don't see me making an AMV from that..." So then I listened to the Cake CD and discovered that "Friend Is A Four Letter Word" was putting scenes of Jin-Roh in my head and I instantly started ripping/encoding/capturing and got that done just before going to sleep.
Tuesday: Worked on the video all day, got 75% of it done.
Wednesday: Finished the video in the mornin', had countless file size and de-interlacing problems (I forgot to de-interlace it as I ripped) and was finally forced to take it to Eiji's house (with XP) and finish encoding the video there since Win98 has that file size limit. Uploaded it to Chriswonderboy's server, made a comeback on that forum I spoke of with the release of my video, which I decided to dedicate to the people who cared that I might be dead.
Today: Discovered Chriswonderboy had problems and took my video down after just one day. I decided to completely redo the whole video to take care of the de-interlacing problems so that I can show it at AWA. That's where I'm at now. -
OH, HAPPY FUGGIN' DAY!
2002-06-07 15:21:32
I'm happier than I've ever been in my entire life.
Writing that journal entry yesterday made something click, and I forgot all about my problems and became extremely happy with myself and my situation in life.
I just said, "Fuck it, fuck that, fuck everything. I don't care about anything anymore!" I put all my past failures and disappointments behind me along with the people who caused all my depressions and annoyed me. I'm much more secure with myself; nothing phases me now. Nothing can bring me down, I'm just too happy with my "not caring" attitude (that's the good not caring attitude, not the give up on life not care attitude). And with the stress building up for the past 3 years (technically, the past 8 years, but that's taking it far) and some heartless woman who fucked with my head for the sole purpose of making me feel like shit (you know who you are, woman), I had thoughts of checking myself into a mental institute. I really was going to.
But, fuck her. Fuck everything, I say again. I'm happy and her attempts to bring me down don't work anymore. I laugh at them, in fact, because they're pointless.
I've also gotten rid of my anti-social attitude. It disappeared. I actually willingly talked to people (including girls) at driver's ed, which I despised on Monday but loved yesterday. Yes, life is good and school is finally out. Next year, college will rule, and I'll start with a clean slate. Maybe get a girlfriend, and some friends who DON'T treat me like shit (looks at the woman again). -
Just die, self.
2002-06-06 14:43:34
I was a very happy individual up until yesterday. Everything was looking better, I was about to graduate, then everything went awry. I screwed up again (won't go into that), I started driver's ed, gotta worry about graduation now, get a job as soon as possible... I hate it when things hit me all at once like that.
That One Thing
The thing I won't go in to. I will say that it hit me like a ton of bricks, and I spent what should have been a very happy last day of high school in a state of depressed, angry confusion.
Driver's Ed
Most retarded thing ever. Apparently, clipping out newspaper articles of dead people and crashes helps me learn how to drive. And homework? WTF!? I thought I was done doing homework! What a bunch of shit! Not only that, but if everyone does all their homework, we get a pizza party and I have already forgotten what the first homework assignment was, therefore screwing an entire class and getting them angry at me right off the bat! The teacher's an idiot, he doesn't explain ANYTHING clearly. I see this'll be tons of fun.
Graduation
I don't want to do it. I'm going to be all moody and depressed, while everyone's cheering and happy. After spending the entire day in a mental slump, with everyone asking, "Hey man, what's wrong." and me answering "I don't want to get into it, I just want to be left alone.", I don't think things will be much better at graduation.
Job
I don't know what the hell I'm doing... I want a job at Fleming, the dream job, but I don't think I'll get it. There's nowhere else I want to work, which means I'll be stuck with a shitty job. But that's life.
I'm just fed up with everything. I'm also tired of bitching to everyone, but I don't want your crap, people. I'm not forcing you to read this. It's MY journal, damn it.
JOURNAL: Super Sapien (J W)
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