- Girl 2004-01-14 20:46:43 I know this is probably a strange way to start a journal, but I'm not used to keeping one and in general would rather not. But I hear sometimes it is good to just write your thoughts down about your life in general. Just to organize your thoughts or as entertainment later on. Regardless, I'm going to write about a topic that is REALLY bothering me lately. This one girl, whom I shall not name, and I were becoming close friends. I had hopes for something more in the future. She had told me that she didn't date and was never going to marry. All BS because throughout these last few months she has been trying to get this one guy that she "really likes" to notice her. And he hasn't *Evil Grin* He has actually ended up being a total jerk to her most of the time. Meanwhile, I just played it smooth. Didn't pressure her or anything. Never brough up the subject of dating. I was hoping I could just slowly make her realize that maybe there are other guys out there. None of this seems like it will work now because two weeks ago, I msg her on MSN asking if she wants to go get my new cell phone with me. Not only can't she, she doesn't want to because she is extremely angry at me. Now I'm thinking to myself, what the hell? I hadn't done anything or said anything that I can remember that would have angered her in the least. Hell she even told me that I'm always nice to her and she couldn't understand why. And out of the blue, I'm a total ass. At first she wouldn't tell me which REALLY pissed me off, but me being the nice guy that I am, kept my cool and said that's ok. Once you calm down and figure things out we'll talk. She didn't calm down or wait. Two seconds later she tells me why. Apparently she has been hearing from "a lot" of people. (1...2 at the most) that I have been going around saying she is in love with me, we will be dating soon, that I'm going to beat up this guy that is being a jerk to her. Now I'm thinking to myself, wait a second, not only did I never say something like this, I've never even THOUGHT of saying something like that. I've never once in our entire relationship given her reason to think I would say something like that, yet now she doesn't believe me. She hasn't talked to me since she told me what was pissing her off. I feel so helpless. I can't talk to her. I can't try to prove to her that I didn't say these things. I can't even find the people who said it to take out some good old righteous vengeance on them. I've never been so helpless in my life. I hate it. If anyone has any thoughts on the subject please feel free to email me. I'm at an all time emotional low and it is making me a rather cold and heartless person according to a few of my friends. Which in itself isn't a bad thing now that I think about it, but regardless any thoughts you have would be appreciated.
JOURNAL: Lord Tarrant (Kellen )
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