Otohiko wrote:Man, that really sucks, sorry to hear
But hey, give yourself some credit, you sound like someone who's keeping pretty sane and reasonable considering the circumstances. If you're actively continuing to help your family through that sort of mess, at such cost to you, well, I really admire that. Otherwise, I hate to be all "been there done that" cause noone can ever claim that, but seriously...
I could've written something like that pretty damn recently. Whatever you do, I only have one bit of advice: don't kick your own ass for any of this. It's not gonna help anyone, and you don't particularly deserve it either. Exaggerated sense of responsibility towards others, combined with diminishing your own problems and the whole "what I want in life doesn't exist anyway" thing is a deadly mix. It will eat up months and years of your time, suck all the energy out of you and then one day you realize it was all just a stage anyway and you could've been a lot more productive in the meantime. You can't control circumstances, but if you can at least spare your sanity and energy to actually
do things, you'll be a lot better for it in the end.
The 'love' and 'god' things will blow over, too. Nope, no guarantee that you'll find either, but then you might find something else instead. Probably. Life's weird like that.
Anyway, just thought I'd say something cause that just sounds like a really painful situation on your part. Hang in there!
I guess you could say I'm keeping sane.
I don't really blame myself for any of what's happened, but perhaps maybe the very first part. I honestly don't even know how my sister could be holding up through this, it's quite confusing to see her smile.
And thanks for the advice, it makes a lot of sense. I've experienced a lot of that myself. The last few months have felt like only a few weeks. Sadly, for me, I quite like it. The quicker it's over, the better, though some things will never end, and I know more are yet to come.
Yeah, life sucks, in other words. It's alright, I know good comes, now and again.
But thanks (:
Pwolf wrote:Damn, that's quite the laundry list D: Sounds like you've got a lot on your plate and I certainly hope you have some good friends around you can talk to. I can't imagine being in a situation like that but don't pity yourself for anything. Life sucks sometimes but life is great some times as well. Just try to recognize that things will get better, sooner or later. I've gone through my fair share of a crappy life. Having been through rejection multiple times, it fucking blows. Took me a fairly long time to get over the first one. Part of that was the situation but part of it was just me. My dad died 8 years ago and it still sucks (see post above). I think the past has left me rather bitter but I things are a lot better then they were. Point being, while the situations i've been through are different then yours, things will get better. It might take a long time but it will get better. I think talking to someone helps a lot. If you think it helps, vent in here as well. That's what this thread is for after all.
I think George summed it up pretty well. Give yourself some credit and hang in there :O
I have two good friends I can talk to, but I can't tell everything about my sister, since there's a whole legal thing. Really frustrating. Luckily, I have a journal, in which I'll vent, like this, but not nearly the caliber. I have pages and pages abut my mom's cancer, yet she only found out about it a couple weeks ago. I don't really plan to vent in here again like this, since I'm more one to keep to myself and just write it down. Some say that's self-destructive, but they don't know what they're talking about. It helps.
I appreciate your response though, and I'm sorry about your dad. My life would completely shatter if I lost one of my parents at this point. It's nice to hear from someone who's been there though, and it's gotten better, even if it can never be 100% better again.
Thanks
Emong wrote:^ I third these comments. You should know there's only a certain amount of pressure and obligations a person can take on her and there's absolutely no reason why you should be able to handle all that emotionally or physically. I don't think I can suggest anything else than allowing yourself some space for all the "incorrect" emotions you must be going through. And don't be afraid to be share all this with the people around you. You can, and should, share whatever responsibilities you've taken on yourself.
I guess there's no reason why I should have to handle all of this, but it's funny how life works out. God sure is good.
Yeah, figuratively, space is good. Literally, like now, not so much. And yeah, been sharing. Not so much with people, but paper. Still, it helps.
Thanks
As someone who tends to keep a lot of things to himself also, I found venting privately in a journal helps a lot so I think what you're doing is perfectly fine.
