A Compelling Question Of Utmost Importance...

[Copycat_Revolver]

Which dinosaur would you most like to get killed by?

[JaddziaDax]

The one that can do it the quickest I suppose?

[Otohiko]

A triceratops.

[Copycat_Revolver]

The one that can do it the quickest I suppose?

Unacceptable answer.

Here, for the sake of the general donating public, are some quick facts that can help ease you through this difficult decision.

Tyrannosaurus Rex - The king of the dinosaurs by general public election (not through divine right as archaeologists once believed), and king for good reason. The "T-Rex", if ever given the chance, will kill you so hard that your three previous generations of family members will all spontaneously combust on their twenty first birthday. That's a time traveling multi-kill: Deluxe Edition. Not to be trifled with.
And an important side note: if a Tyrannosaurus is performing complex heart surgery on you and botches the operation, thus killing you, your past relatives are safe. However, the resultant malpractice suit will be powerful enough to kill seventeen time lawyers.

Velociraptor - Brought to the public light in the documentary Jurassic Park I, II, and III (where they shared a producer's credit), the Velociraptor is a fierce hunter that roams in packs, strolls in loose knit groups, and dances in conga lines. They are known to have a particular affinity for the meat of the common Australian hunter, but don't you think for a second that they may spare you and your delicious, non-aussie meat. A Bloomin' Onion may temporarily distract them however.
Aside from the actual act of being torn apart by a pack of cold, calculating, intellectual murderers, your wallet will soon be plucked from your freshly bloodied Levi's and then it is just a matter of time before your identity and credit history is at the mercy of the lizard swarm that just took you down.
Your bank accounts will be emptied promptly while all available assets will be sold off in illegal "lizard markets". The head Velociraptor will then assume your name for the purpose of furthering its own elaborate pyramid scheme involving out of date phone books and electronic knife sharpeners.
It may be years before investigators will be able to apprehend your murderers, and even then the charges are usually dropped for the cost of a crate of imported cheese, a well known weakness of law enforcement.
Experts believe that upwards of 16,000 people in the U.S. and Canada are actually Velociraptors.

Triceratops - It doesn't matter how he kills you. He will have sex with your corpse. You have been warned.

Brontosaurus - Huge, lumbering giants of the gentle plant eating variety. A death by brontosaurus is almost always accidental. For instance, you are napping under a tree in the park. You are all tuckered out from an intense game of Frisbee golf. A dog stands nearby, sniffing at the air, intently seeking out the nearby meat being grilled by a forty-six year old father of two, having a relaxing summer weekend in the park with family and friends. You are not one of those family or friends. You tagged along with that man's estranged niece and watched her grin her way through a painfully awkward set of familial interactions which are merely a set up for what will ultimately culminate in one last desperate request for money. After grabbing a single hot dog while avoiding any sort of meaningful discussion, you struck up a conversation with a man walking his dog in the summer heat. There was a perceived insult. There was a challenge. And so, you engaged this nameless person in a round of the age old sport of Frisbee Golf. At stake was your last glimmer of honor, no, your very life was hanging in the balance. With one last herculean effort, you vanquished your foe and sacrificed him to the heavens. Now his dog, master-less, must now consider the new found struggle to feed itself in a harsh world. Exhausted, you lie beneath a tree and fall in to a deep state of super nap.
Then, a Brontosaurus steps on you.
Let's be honest. Tiring life or death struggle aside, how did you not hear that thing coming? I mean it weighs like sixteen trillion tons. I can't help but suspect you had some sort of death wish.
But the sad truth is, in recent years, Brontosauruses have claimed many more victims after their recent hover board upgrade, making them the new silent killer. (the old silent killer was the rare puddle shark)

Brachiosaurus - This is not actually a dinosaur. It is a type of quilt.

Pterodactyl - If you've been reading this far, you've probably already been killed by a Pterodactyl, the nightmare of the sky (if you sleep while in the air). Scientists have still never reached any sort of consensus on how these fierce flying monsters ever managed to construct their signature helicopters, but one thing is for sure, you are going to die in a messy and overly dramatic fashion. What were you even doing on that roof? Did you think that Stupid and Not a Good Idea would somehow alchemize your fragile skull into some sort of invincibility elixir and protect you?
No.


This is but a small sampling of the thousands of dinosaur varieties who can deliver your untimely demise. Why not visit your local library and learn more about these horrible demons from the lizard realm. If death by dinosaur has to happen (it does), then why not go out with style? Or, barring that, why not go out with the least amount of pathetic bawling and prayer as possible.
Get killed by a dinosaur today!

If you have any questions about your dinosaur death of choice, post them here and I will seek to provide as much enlightenment as is possible in these dire times.

[Ileia]

I heard alchemy. I'll be needing two cats.

[dreamawake]

T-Rex. One bite and I'm gone.

[Otohiko]

Oh yeah, I forgot, I have photographic proof:



...and it's all Kit's fault

[Kionon]

Stella the Stegosaurus. Fifty billion points if you get the reference.

[guy07]

Oh yeah, I forgot, I have photographic proof:

Quoted Image converted to link:
http://i131.photobucket.com/albums/p301 ... 06/tri.jpg

I've never seen somebody look so happy while their head is being bitten off.lol

I think I'd like to be killed by Raptor. They'd hunt your ass down, run you into a trap and rip you to pieces. You can outsmart a T-rex or a Triceratops, but Raptors were the smart ones. I wouldn't feel bad about dying, because I would know I lost to something that outsmarted me. Plus I just think they're cool.

[ZephyrStar]

OH. FREAKIN WOW. At this point I must say Triceratops as well. It can easily multikill with each of it's horns.