Rayzox wrote:Thank you.
Ps : the version without lyrics is here ^^
A significant improvement.
Good:
- Song/Anime combination
This is a VERY strong combination. It really hammers home the concept of just how abusive he was when they were younger and how he has to struggle with that guilt and figure out how to make amends. Depressingly, because I can read the Japanese, but have not yet seen the source, I was particularly moved by where SHE apologises to HIM. This is shockingly common, where the bullied believes they must have done something wrong to warrant such behavior. That I've seen it in person, in Japanese schools, made this particularly effective with your song choice. This is not a pleasant video. It's decidedly unhappy, and the combination actually makes it unhappier still.
- Scene selection/Storyboarding/HEART
Related to the above, you did extremely well combining the elementary school, junior high school, and high school time periods in order to strongly imply, if not explicitly state, that what we are viewing is going on inside his head. These are flashbacks combined with his distraught conscience, and we are merely privy to this inner film.
- Audio quality
I put this on my Bose speakers and while the sound is very lo-fi, retro that seemed to be part of the sound engineering. What I particularly liked was how deep and rumbling the bass was, and if I plugged my ears and laid my hands flat on my desk, I could FEEL the editing synch. This is how many deaf people "listen" to music. Especially if, unlike the girl, they don't have or can't have hearing aids (cochlear implants). The fact that I was able to follow your video (albeit without the words, of course, this is where the use of subtitle lyrics WOULD be a great addition, but perhaps should be smaller and more towards the bottom of the screen) by the feel of the sound alone is quite nice.
Needs Improvement:
- Effects
I understand where you were going with the colorisation (this isn't an accurate reflection of real events, we are in his head, and so this over saturation, pink-shift, etc is supposed to communicate the haze of memory), but I don't think it was necessary. I think you could have left this to your scene choices, cuts, and transitions. I'm torn on the digitalness and quickness of your transitions. On the one hand, it seems somewhat out of place with the song, on the other hand it communicates the jumbled nature of his memories jumping around from time to time, memory to memory. I think I would be more okay with these transitions if you got rid of the colorisation, but I'd have to see it. Honestly, the strength here is your storyboarding. A lot of the effects you have done feel like they're added noise. You already have such a strong narrative here, I am just not sure it is necessary. If anything, it's probably subtracting more than it adds.
- Watermark/Opening Credits
I suggest if you insist on adding some kind of credits, you do so with the old, less obtrusive MTV/VH1 style lower lefthand corner details. Otherwise I suggested title cards before and after. I like that you let the watermark fade, but your name being blasted at the beginning of the video was distracting when I was trying to take in the setting of the scene. Sometimes I don't add title cards at all. No credits. I let the video stand on its own. If someone is going to take your video or your source, they'll find a way to do it.
PROBLEMS :
