What is Tachibana?

Nestorath69 · Post by **Nestorath69** » Sat Jan 17, 2004 7:08 pm

Hey, i been like, reading this thread and making quotes and replies to this shit for like... hours or whatever while i get my new P4 computer (Project name: Savannah) FDISK'ed, formatted, converted to NTFS, and finally, installing Windows 2000...

Gotta jet, gonna run to betos...

J-0080 · Post by **J-0080** » Sat Jan 17, 2004 10:36 pm

Well I finally got around to reading the first episode, pretty good. I know if this was made into a TV show that I would watch it.

Oh, and I only found two spelling errors, so the previous edits did a good job in that respect.

ryuu_hime13 · Post by **ryuu_hime13** » Mon Jan 19, 2004 11:41 am

I'm not sure about showing it to the media folks just yet, Izumi. Once you've converted it into script form you should probably hold onto it for a while and keep revising. If you're 100% comfortable with it the way it is, then go right on ahead, though. I have this tendency to look back on stuff I wrote 2 days ago and think "Aaah! What was I thinking? Must edit!"

But then, I'm borderline psychotic so I might not be the best person to listen to.

I wanna read episode 3!!!!

In regards to copyrighting: I heard that thing about mailing it to yourself, but I wouldn't take any chances. That's why I haven't posted any of my stuff on this site. I emailed the US Library of Congress about it and the response I got was that I'd have to send them a copy of the manuscript and fill out a form or something. I think they charge for it, though.

But not much.

Moonlight Soldier · Post by **Moonlight Soldier** » Mon Jan 19, 2004 3:15 pm

ryuu_hime13 wrote:I'm not sure about showing it to the media folks just yet, Izumi. Once you've converted it into script form you should probably hold onto it for a while and keep revising. If you're 100% comfortable with it the way it is, then go right on ahead, though. I have this tendency to look back on stuff I wrote 2 days ago and think "Aaah! What was I thinking? Must edit!"

But then, I'm borderline psychotic so I might not be the best person to listen to.

I wanna read episode 3!!!!

In regards to copyrighting: I heard that thing about mailing it to yourself, but I wouldn't take any chances. That's why I haven't posted any of my stuff on this site. I emailed the US Library of Congress about it and the response I got was that I'd have to send them a copy of the manuscript and fill out a form or something. I think they charge for it, though. But not much.

Mailing it to yourself though it works isn't a sure form of Copyrighing, if you're going to copyright it dish out the dollars and do it, then you know for sure your work is safe.

Nestorath69 · Post by **Nestorath69** » Mon Jan 19, 2004 4:19 pm

I read the first chapter. Where do i get the second one? Check it out: A few things i noticed about the first chapter. I hate to knock your work, so I'll start out positive. The stuff was great, it seemed like you had a strong and powerful vision when you built this.
The flip side: We can't see the vision you had. In your mind's eye, your characters are fleshed out, have their quirks and back history... but you barely touched on anything in the first episode. I had a hard time differentiating between the characters because there was no descriptions of body language, hand gestures, facial changes, etc... Although I could really identify with everyone's overwhelming desire to throttle the otaku... Andrew, right?

Anyways, also describing the smaller environmental elements as the characters interact with them would put even more detail into this portrait you're painting.

Hey, it's just suggestions. Other than those things, the whole thing was AWESOME. Like i said, i want chapter 2.

Don't hate me, I lub you! ...wait a minute... I always say that...

I LIKE PIE!

ryuu_hime13 · Post by **ryuu_hime13** » Mon Jan 19, 2004 9:28 pm

I think the reason it doesn't include the actions and such yet is because she's still converting it to script form. In story form, you can't just write actions out in great detail because it leads to run-on sentences and paragraphs that seem to drag on. But Izumi mentioned working on a script form, so that should make it easier to visualize what's going on.