alive barely...

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Jim Hawkings21122
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alive barely...

Post by Jim Hawkings21122 » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:26 pm

here i am alive and well.

for the most part anyway.

first i would like to thank all of the people here on the org that posted on my thread to give me advice, especially oto and savia, thanx for the link savia i called them and they helped a little but no all that much.

also let me clarify the reason as to why i posted telling everyone that i was going to kill myself.
I wanted advice from people who weren't immersed in my llife or the problems surrounding it, i wanted advice from people who could only give a kind of 3rd person persvective opinion on it.

and tho those who wante d me to die or were cherring me on, i have no bad will towards you, i can see now how from the looks of it that i posted for the attention and/or made the whole thing up, which is not what i had intended for people to think,

and to you el banana i know that you said you have lost what respect you had for me but know that i still hold some for you, regardless of what happens i kinda look up to you and a few other on the org, not as an idol or someone that i want to become persay just someone that i a fair level of respect for.

and not to disapoint some of you but i still cut myself a few times, most were not deep but one nicked a small vein or someting cause it bled a hell of alot. not anything fatal tho at the time.
i was about to make it deeper when a frined called and interrupted me, they could tell something was wrong by my voice and came to my house.

needless to say she was a littel suprsed when i answered the door with and arm that was dripping blood, after she bandaged it we sat down and talked (for some time i might add) in the long run she got me to not want to kill myself over it anymore and stayed with me most of the night to make sure that i would be ok.

so not i guess i realize that that was not something that i should have tried to kill myself over,and i am fine for the most part now.

i still feel very depressed about what happened but i don't think that i'm ever going to think about suicide with something like this ever again, cause its just not worth it....for just about any reason.

anyway i am currently pondering weither or not i should see a psychologist about this little *incident* or not.
RoXxoRs13: Is masturbation a sin?
Yomomma: I think so.....
RoXxoRs13: Then i'm going to hell, straight to hell
Yomomma: At least you won't be alone ^_^

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Moonlight Soldier
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Post by Moonlight Soldier » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:28 pm

I'm glad you're alright Jim. And ya, I suggest talking to someone non- orgish about it.

/so happy you're alright : )

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Otohiko
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Post by Otohiko » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:29 pm

Great news. I hope you get this sorted out and put past you, with proper lessons learned, etc.

And don't let those comments get to you. A couple of posters lost a great deal of my respect in that thread. There's a fine line between lack of political correctness and a lack of basic humaneness.

So, get well. Hope it's all uphill from here.
The Birds are using humanity in order to throw something terrifying at this green pig. And then what happens to us all later, that’s simply not important to them…

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SSJVegita0609
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Post by SSJVegita0609 » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:32 pm

Thus more proof that the org is always there for you :wink:

I'm glad you're okay d00d.
The best effects are the ones you don't notice.

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Final Saiyyan
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Post by Final Saiyyan » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:33 pm

well i hope you feel better now.

you had me going for a while there.

whoever she was she wasnt worth it. you'll find someone better.for sure! :D

look at me ive been dumped loads of times . an i always thought she was the ONE. like a month later i was out with someone else!!! :D :D

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Trident
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Post by Trident » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:34 pm

*hugs*
"The dice of love are madness and turmoil."--Anakreon

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Jim Hawkings21122
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Post by Jim Hawkings21122 » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:35 pm

Final Saiyyan wrote:well i hope you feel better now.

you had me going for a while there.

whoever she was she wasnt worth it. you'll find someone better.for sure! :D

look at me ive been dumped loads of times . an i always thought she was the ONE. like a month later i was out with someone else!!! :D :D
i just lol'ed
RoXxoRs13: Is masturbation a sin?
Yomomma: I think so.....
RoXxoRs13: Then i'm going to hell, straight to hell
Yomomma: At least you won't be alone ^_^

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El Banana
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Post by El Banana » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:35 pm

Nice to see you kicking, Jim.

First, let me say that I'm sure none of the posters wanted you to kill yourself. But some of us really hate to see anyone threatening to commit suicide, especially over the internet. That's what the Goth forums are for.

Either way, you need help. Make sure you get it, because that matter, no matter how hugely overblown it seemed, is certainly no ground to want to commit suicide. :?
I like bugging people. Deal with it.

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KillDieMurder
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Post by KillDieMurder » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:44 pm

Glad to see your still around Jim. :D

And yeah, talk to someone. It helps.
FF6 AMV | Max Payne 2 Vid | End of eva
If my life were a video game, Pop-Tarts would give me full health.
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azulmagia
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Post by azulmagia » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:47 pm

*sigh of relief*

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Final Saiyyan
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Post by Final Saiyyan » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:48 pm

help would be good .but i think it might bring back painful memories but i suppose getting help would be a real benefit to you cause i mean ive seen people get it and theyve never regretted it. just appreciate life and warn me if your gonna post something like that again next time i might have a heart attack or something.

this might not be helpful but when i break up with someone (or mostly they break up with me!) i drink LUCOZADE!!!! why i dont know but it tastes really nice!! :D

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Jim Hawkings21122
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Post by Jim Hawkings21122 » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:49 pm

Final Saiyyan wrote:help would be good .but i think it might bring back painful memories but i suppose getting help would be a real benefit to you cause i mean ive seen people get it and theyve never regretted it. just appreciate life and warn me if your gonna post something like that again next time i might have a heart attack or something.

this might not be helpful but when i break up with someone (or mostly they break up with me!) i drink LUCOZADE!!!! why i dont know but it tastes really nice!! :D
what in the hell is lucozade?
RoXxoRs13: Is masturbation a sin?
Yomomma: I think so.....
RoXxoRs13: Then i'm going to hell, straight to hell
Yomomma: At least you won't be alone ^_^

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J-0080
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Post by J-0080 » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:53 pm

Happy to hear you're well.

i would definetly insist you see a specialist about this, or if not, then at least maybe talk to a counselor at school or something.

I want you to stay well after all. :)
paizuri wrote:There's also no need for introductions because we're generally a friendly bunch and will welcome you with wide open arms anyway.

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razzlychan
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Post by razzlychan » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:54 pm

well, i already talked to yas on aim, but i'll posted sumthin anywayz :P glad that u didn't killyurself. very very glad. so don't try it again ><;;
Mamimi: Takkun may have a big forehead, but he's a real good kid! Please don't hurt him?
Haruko: HE'S HIDING BETWEEN YOUR LEGS!!!
Mamimi:What? But he's a real good boy. He'd never even mention having seen my panties!
Haruko:THEN HE'S GAY!!!

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Final Saiyyan
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Post by Final Saiyyan » Fri Dec 05, 2003 8:55 pm

that orange glucose drink. shit. they dont do that in the states. damn i thought it was worldwide.

it is kinda nice though but i dont buy it anymore cause it has a shit aftertaste and my friends dog gets it off me when im not looking , drinks it, and then starts trying to climb up a car.

its kinda funny to watch until stuff starts getting thrown out of windows at it. only gets funier if it hits the little shit by something! :D

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