JOURNAL: seasons

  • not again 2015-04-13 00:52:09 A whole 2 posts down from this one is a "rant post" where I bemoan my lack of progress in getting anything done in the way of editing an AMV that people would actually want to watch. I swear I didn't plan this out, but it's been 6 months to the day since I wrote it. Now what?

    Since then I've begun work on at least 3 AMVs that I considered to be potentially interesting or at least more watchable than the stuff I've churned out up to this point. One idea in particular seemed really promising. It would feature an anime that I really love, along with a song from a band I really like, and together they seem to be a perfect fit in a way to an almost uncanny degree.

    In addition to being a series I really love and enjoy, this anime -- which I won't name here, it doesn't really matter anyway -- was a new series, which would inevitably lend the kind of urgency and relevance to the video that I'd never been able to start out with before. Even if I made a terrible AMV, it would be guaranteed to have at least ten times as many views as everything else I've made combined. Mind you, I would never release it in the first place if I didn't think it was up to par (this has always been a rule of mine, although my standards haven't always been what they are now).

    Since October, I've listened to my song of choice at least a hundred times or more, which is probably a safe estimate considering how I'd often play it on a loop during my entire commute to school and back. All the while I would play imaginary drafts of the AMV in my head, which would have to do until I'd have time to actually edit it together. I've been really busy over the past year, but I guess that's Real Life finally calling my name.

    I slowly collected and prepared footage in late January and sat down to actually edit sometime in early February.

    I don't know exactly how much time I've spent working on it. Quite a lot, that's all I can say for sure. And today I'm pretty much stuck where I was when I started. I literally have nothing at all to show for my work. I know that early drafts of a video don't have to be perfect and sometimes won't be very "good" at all, but despite my best efforts I can't string together a series of clips that flow or make any sense in sequence. It's been really shocking to see how badly this project has come together, which I wasn't expecting at all considering how much I was looking forward to working on it and how mentally prepared I felt going into it.

    This AMV would have to be really good and a big step up from everything I've made so far, not just to hold my own in a contest (which I have zero expectations of winning) but because I feel like I owe it to the original work to not screw it all up. From a fundamental editing standpoint, that goal hasn't been achieved. And in terms of creativity, I'm finding myself unable to break out of the same pattern that half of my videos fall into. I've made at least 4 AMVs that follow a particular structure in the exact same way and I don't seem to have the imagination to break away from it.

    Unfortunately, I really don't think that I'll have anything ready to submit in time for the convention contest deadline. That's not an earth-shattering problem to have but it's really disappointing considering the fact that I'd promised myself that this was going to be the one thing that I would make sure to do for myself this year. I know I can always take my time with this, work at my own pace and get it done at some point in the future, but with more and more AMVs featuring this source being entered on the Org and dumped onto Youtube every day, the chances that anyone will still want to watch a new [series title] AMV in another year or two isn't very high. Those dramatic, powerful scenes that everyone uses tend to lose their effect after showing up in so many different videos.

    I'll have a month off in May and after that, there will be a busy span of a year and a time in which I really wonder how I'll find time to edit at all. Maybe it will work itself out, but I know how much I struggle with time management (this is my biggest problem, actually), so I'm not counting on it.

    More editing, less complaining. I know. 
  • oh well, I should have been studying anyway 2015-01-30 11:49:31 Watched a whole movie on my computer over the course of a few days (little by little, as I've had time) while making clips for a new AMV. And I had the whole thing planned out in my head. It was very simple and it made perfect sense as I could get a couple of important clips from the film's final scene.

    What I'd forgotten was that this is a Ghibli movie and those scenes have the end credits playing over them. 
  • new quick comments? 2014-12-04 18:59:42 This hasn't happened for me in a long time.

    Even got one on my first AMV, which I now think is really awful. The concept isn't bad but I see far too many mistakes in it to want to show it to anyone anymore. Glad someone didn't hate it, whoever they are.

    I'll definitely stick by the techniques I used in "Saudade" but I think I was really inconsistent with the way I did it and it brings down the video in a really distracting way. I really don't want to make those kind of mistakes again.

    65% done with a long AMV that I'm sure there is zero audience for and that no one will really like. If and when I release it, I won't be surprised if I get accused of trolling, but I assure you I'm not.

    Suddenly interested in getting started on a new idea, and seeing how my month-long holiday break starts in a few days, it might happen. Then again, I'm pretty sure my life will be finished if I don't pass a certain class in the spring that I'm not prepared for at all. So there will have to be hours of studying for that, unfortunately.

    You always think that you'll have time to work on all your ideas in the future, but it might be presumptuous to assume that the hobby is going to stand still and wait for you. 
  • standard rant post 2014-10-12 11:14:26 I don't have a lot of time to work on AMVs these days. Which really sucks because I have a lot of ideas that I want to bring to life. And because I'd like to have something to enter the AMV contest at Anime Central in May. It takes me a really, really long time to finish videos so I know I'd have to start this before the end of the year, and even that might not give me enough time to finish it before the deadline.

    I've been somewhat vocal about my disapproval of contest-mania that's sort of swept through this whole hobby so admitting that probably makes me look like a massive hypocrite. To be honest, the only reason I'd want to enter a contest is because I really want to see something that I've made up on the big screen (or, in the case of ACEN, a kinda-average sized screen, oh well). That's been something I've wanted to experience ever since I started editing, but I've never felt like I've ever been close to being good enough, until now. Okay, even now I have my doubts, but I feel like my ideas this time around are feasible given where I'm at these days. It's something I could pull off, maybe. But I think it would take a very long time to finish. I really should have started it over the summer but I had no motivation, apparently.

    When it comes down to it, entering a contest seems like the only way to get people to watch your AMV without whoring yourself out for attention, which I hate to do. This doesn't stop people from going ahead and doing both but you know what I mean.

    Even if I never enter a contest, I still want to continue editing. There's 3 or 4 ideas in my head that I'd like to finally <i>do something</i> about but I'm so busy with school right now that I just don't know how I'm going to fit in time to edit (let alone the time-consuming process of planning, preparing sources, etc). It doesn't have to be so difficult. Just set aside a little bit of time each day, right? Well, maybe that's how it works for most people but unfortunately that's not how it goes down when I'm trying to get shit done.

    I have a huge paper to work on and 20 days to get it done. I think it has to be 25 pages, I'm not sure. I have 5 pages done, which represents about a month of work. That is what I need to do today, tomorrow, all week long, and every day for the rest of the month. That's what I'll be doing as soon as I post this entry (unless I screw around on the Internet for another hour, which is actually pretty likely).

    I think about being creative every day, but I guess I just have a problem doing the hard work that it requires. There's a lot more to that than I'm going to bother typing out here but it's a really big, never-ending source of frustration to me.

    I don't expect anyone to find this but I just wanted to rant and there's something about journal entries that allows me to do this without any pressure whereas I could never do this in a blog entry, at least not any more than I already have. 
  • whoa 2014-08-23 22:24:56 Am I not using the search function correctly or is there not a single Doobie Brothers AMV listed on this entire site?

    I don't even want to watch one that badly, I'm just kind of shocked by that and I don't know why. 
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