I liked this.
Had a good pace to it, and was just a really nice concept. Had a nice mood about it too.
Visually speaking, the watermark is a big nono.
Next time, try cropping it out. The footage was a tad pixelated and had some blurred lines about it. The additional overlayed images of Asuna were also very pixelated or weren't properly feathered to keep the straight lines out.
Editing wise, the flashing white lights around 1:40 felt a bit out of place, and some of the transitions really bobbed around scene-wise and were really harsh.
I was also a little confused about the ending. I'd followed the altered storyline up to that point, but felt a bit off then.
Still, I dug it.