how long do you feel grief when a close one dies? whom and how long would you mourn for most and longest? family? friends? pets? how do you deal with it?
i haven't had many close ones leave me fortunately. my closest was my dog Star, who i had for eight years from when i was six to fourteen. as i recall i was in deep grief, like constantly felt a hurt/sad feeling for a bit under a week. then for like 2 months, the feeling faded, but I'd still think about her pretty often. i suppose the thing that best made me feel better was knowing that she had a happy and pampered life and everyone spoiled her.
but other than that, i haven't had such a heavy grieving process. my grandfather led a long and (what i consider) successful life when he passed on, and i've lost a couple of not-so-close friends that i felt sorrow about, but not something that consumed me.
my cat Smokey will be likely to go in the next few years. she's 12 now and the longest i've had a pet, so i know i will be pretty distraught when she goes. and i've thought about it and tried hugging her as much as i can when i go back to parents' home where Smokey is.
i think i'd be most devastated when my mom dies. strangely enough, i've had dreams where she dies and they are the worst ones i have (well, most relieving to wake up from.) literally, i would lose some meaning to my life, if she died, because many things i do and decisions i make, i do with her in mind, considering how she would judge my decisions/actions. i think i'd be completely withdrawn and dysfunctional for a month or more, then go into a duller constant pain for maybe a year or more. my sister and closest friends would be the next most hurtful. i might be able recover a bit sooner, but would probably go through the same processes of social withdrawal and dulled pain.








