The Vent Thread

[Qyot27]

Had a bad anxiety attack a few days ago, and it's been recurring in waves since (although not as severe as the first one). Trying to talk myself down varies in its usefulness - sometimes remembering that there were things that seemed inconsistent helps, but not always, and the other stuff gets fixated on. Details are too personal to post about, though.

[dreamawake]

Ah, anxiety attacks, my specialty. If you need any advice on dealing with those Qyot, that is if they don't just go away on their own anytime soon, get at me.

[Qyot27]

I've had to deal with them since high school (they were more frequent and much worse back then, since occasionally they'd escalate into severe panic attacks that required the school to call paramedics; after one of them, I was put on Paxil for a year). They usually pass fairly quickly, but certain triggers are worse than others.

[dreamawake]

Ah, sounds like you already know your shit then. Yeah, I deal with the ones that escalate to panic attacks on a regular basis. Shit is not fun.

[hasteroth]

So my best friend and I had a total falling out. She refuses to talk to me anymore. Great.

[Pwolf]

[dj_ultima_the_great]

/girl shit

/seriously... major girl shit... this is about bras, boobs, and graphic, personal descriptions of them both

Spoiler :

I'm pretty much going to blow my brains out at this point. I have snapped the undewire in all but one of my bras, and I am wearing this last one like it is made of glass. I can't twist to the side, I can't lean forward, I can't compress it in any way for fear that the damn thing will bust on me and then all I'll have left are the itchy, unsupportive, overheating, wireless boxed bras left to use. I mean, this is after I had transplanted the good underwire from one bra into another where the wire had broken repeatedly, which means in the last few months, I have snapped at least eight underwires. EIGHT of them. What the fuck!? Why now?

When I say "snapped" and "broken," I mean just that, by the way. I don't mean, "pushed out of its seams." I am good enough with a needle and thread to fix that problem easily. These bras are being rendered unwearable because the metal is actually breaking.

And no, whoever is about to say, "Well just remove the wires and wear them that way," it doesn't work like that. If the bra isn't actually made to be wireless to begin with, it won't support properly without the wires. Even then, my experiences with wireless bras have been extremely unpleasant. They are always covered in ugly, itchy lace that never softens up no matter how much you wash them. In the summer, they are hot and disgusting; they make you feel damp with sweat all day. And for fuck's sake, why can they not separate my boobs? I can't stand the feeling of my breasts touching. In the summer, it's a sweaty, nasty nightmare. I don't WANT cleavage. My chest will do that whether or not the bra forces them together. I need these beasts to be in their separate cages, thank you. (This is also the reason why I refuse to wear sports bras, as I always end up with a squishy pyramid at the center of my sternum after five minutes of moving around in one of the things. There is no control, no structure, no lifting and separating in those things.)

Also, why do bra companies assume that just because I'm large-breasted that it means I want sheer mesh cups with a bazillion VERY visible, itchy seams? Yes, believe it or not, I want a little shaping, a little moulding, a little padding, AT LEAST so my poor nipples aren't nuclear rockets in the winter. I want this thing to lay smooth and flat under my clothes, and lace, seams, and a lack of proper covering over the sensitive bits are really fucking with my mojo here.

And don't you dare breathe a word about going braless. Literally the worst sensation ever. I can only sleep without one.

So back to why I'm going to blow my brains out. As I said, I am on my last bra, and for some time now, I have been trying to find some place - ANY place - that carries bras in my size. See, I finally just broke the last ugly barrier: I'm officially too big to buy my bras in physical stores. For full disclosure, that means 40DD. Look around sometime; unless you live in a very large city with specialty stores or huge outlets containing extended sizes (I don't!), that's the largest size that most brands carry, and even if they carry extended sizes, the physical locations do not stock them.

What am I? Well, I thought was a 42DDD. From what one, single bra I was able to find and try on after months of searching in stores, I thought I had figured out my size. So, I went snooping around online, only to find that the online environment is just as hostile. Finding any places that carry above 40DD is hard to say the least, and if they do, they cost more than I can afford on a Wal-Mart paycheck. I finally broke down and went to Just My Size (haven't had a good track record with their products), said to hell with the prices, and bought four types of bras in black and white. Well, none of those fit. Fabulous. Eight bras to be returned. I could talk about how horribly uncomfortable and poorly designed they were, but I'll refrain. Suffice it to say, Playtex knows fuck-all about designing bras, apparently.

What I did learn is that I am NOT a 42DDD. In all of them, the band was too tight, while the cups mysteriously had room in them, which I was not expecting. So apparently I gained weight around my torso, but not in the actual breast tissue.

Theory number two: I am a 44DD. Now if I can actually find some fucking places that sell that size. I am loathe to go back to Just My Size, because even if I got the right size, the bras themselves were just awful. I got really, really excited when I found a site called Simply Yours, which has all kinds of bras in my size - cute ones, too! And then I found out that they only ship to the UK. Wow, great sales move there. There is a huge market (no pun intended) for plus-sized women over here in the United States, and as my searches are indicating, there clearly aren't enough resources available to us. Why would you not want to be the company that's known for providing adorable, functional bras in an otherwise boring, monochrome sea of your competitor's ungainly, hooks-and-eyes-for-miles, breast armor? I just don't get it.

To wrap this up (clearly not in a decent bra AHAHAHA), I am just exhausted. I'm at the end of my rope. I don't know where to look to find something that will actually fit me (and deliver to my area, because that's apparently a problem).

Either this last wire is going to snap, or I will. Start placing your bets.

[dreamawake]

So my best friend and I had a total falling out. She refuses to talk to me anymore. Great.

At least your best friend is still alive. You can fix things.

I hate to give The Jokerr any credit but listen to this the message is real
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AlHN6iAFcfY

[JaddziaDax]

/girl shit

/seriously... major girl shit... this is about bras, boobs, and graphic, personal descriptions of them both

Spoiler :

I'm pretty much going to blow my brains out at this point. I have snapped the undewire in all but one of my bras, and I am wearing this last one like it is made of glass. I can't twist to the side, I can't lean forward, I can't compress it in any way for fear that the damn thing will bust on me and then all I'll have left are the itchy, unsupportive, overheating, wireless boxed bras left to use. I mean, this is after I had transplanted the good underwire from one bra into another where the wire had broken repeatedly, which means in the last few months, I have snapped at least eight underwires. EIGHT of them. What the fuck!? Why now?

When I say "snapped" and "broken," I mean just that, by the way. I don't mean, "pushed out of its seams." I am good enough with a needle and thread to fix that problem easily. These bras are being rendered unwearable because the metal is actually breaking.

And no, whoever is about to say, "Well just remove the wires and wear them that way," it doesn't work like that. If the bra isn't actually made to be wireless to begin with, it won't support properly without the wires. Even then, my experiences with wireless bras have been extremely unpleasant. They are always covered in ugly, itchy lace that never softens up no matter how much you wash them. In the summer, they are hot and disgusting; they make you feel damp with sweat all day. And for fuck's sake, why can they not separate my boobs? I can't stand the feeling of my breasts touching. In the summer, it's a sweaty, nasty nightmare. I don't WANT cleavage. My chest will do that whether or not the bra forces them together. I need these beasts to be in their separate cages, thank you. (This is also the reason why I refuse to wear sports bras, as I always end up with a squishy pyramid at the center of my sternum after five minutes of moving around in one of the things. There is no control, no structure, no lifting and separating in those things.)

Also, why do bra companies assume that just because I'm large-breasted that it means I want sheer mesh cups with a bazillion VERY visible, itchy seams? Yes, believe it or not, I want a little shaping, a little moulding, a little padding, AT LEAST so my poor nipples aren't nuclear rockets in the winter. I want this thing to lay smooth and flat under my clothes, and lace, seams, and a lack of proper covering over the sensitive bits are really fucking with my mojo here.

And don't you dare breathe a word about going braless. Literally the worst sensation ever. I can only sleep without one.

So back to why I'm going to blow my brains out. As I said, I am on my last bra, and for some time now, I have been trying to find some place - ANY place - that carries bras in my size. See, I finally just broke the last ugly barrier: I'm officially too big to buy my bras in physical stores. For full disclosure, that means 40DD. Look around sometime; unless you live in a very large city with specialty stores or huge outlets containing extended sizes (I don't!), that's the largest size that most brands carry, and even if they carry extended sizes, the physical locations do not stock them.

What am I? Well, I thought was a 42DDD. From what one, single bra I was able to find and try on after months of searching in stores, I thought I had figured out my size. So, I went snooping around online, only to find that the online environment is just as hostile. Finding any places that carry above 40DD is hard to say the least, and if they do, they cost more than I can afford on a Wal-Mart paycheck. I finally broke down and went to Just My Size (haven't had a good track record with their products), said to hell with the prices, and bought four types of bras in black and white. Well, none of those fit. Fabulous. Eight bras to be returned. I could talk about how horribly uncomfortable and poorly designed they were, but I'll refrain. Suffice it to say, Playtex knows fuck-all about designing bras, apparently.

What I did learn is that I am NOT a 42DDD. In all of them, the band was too tight, while the cups mysteriously had room in them, which I was not expecting. So apparently I gained weight around my torso, but not in the actual breast tissue.

Theory number two: I am a 44DD. Now if I can actually find some fucking places that sell that size. I am loathe to go back to Just My Size, because even if I got the right size, the bras themselves were just awful. I got really, really excited when I found a site called Simply Yours, which has all kinds of bras in my size - cute ones, too! And then I found out that they only ship to the UK. Wow, great sales move there. There is a huge market (no pun intended) for plus-sized women over here in the United States, and as my searches are indicating, there clearly aren't enough resources available to us. Why would you not want to be the company that's known for providing adorable, functional bras in an otherwise boring, monochrome sea of your competitor's ungainly, hooks-and-eyes-for-miles, breast armor? I just don't get it.

To wrap this up (clearly not in a decent bra AHAHAHA), I am just exhausted. I'm at the end of my rope. I don't know where to look to find something that will actually fit me (and deliver to my area, because that's apparently a problem).

Either this last wire is going to snap, or I will. Start placing your bets.

I feel your pain D:

[dj_ultima_the_great]

Update to the last post:

Spoiler :

So what the friggity frak??? A week ago, the US version of the Simply Be website had nothing in stock in my size... or much of any other size for that matter. Now, suddenly everything is stocked again. Motherfucker. I must have caught it in the middle of a seasonal clearance and/or switchover or something. That's all I can think. The site had been behaving a little oddly, but I had just chalked it up to crappy design. Anyway, good news is that I have another set of bras coming my way, and hopefully they will fit. They're all at least in the style I wanted, so no complaints there - and most of them are friggin' cute. I can't even get mad about paying $178 for ten of them, either, because I saved $76 with a promotion code and I got free shipping for having an order over $75. Persistence pays off? I'm not counting my chickens before the eggs have hatched, though; this could be just as bad as the last set and have none of them fit at all. God, please, don't do that to me. I have enough on my plate without worrying about how a stupid article of clothing is screwing with my day.

I realize that this is very "first world problem" to a lot of people, but if you have a large chest as well, then you know how badly this can mess with your ability to perform physical tasks. The damn water balloons NEED to be restrained, and not having the proper tools to do so is frustrating. I work in an area where I am always on the move, bending over, reaching up, repetitive movements with my upper body, and I just don't have time to be thinking about whether or not my tits are comfortable and stable. I have a damn job to do. So don't go thinking that this is a matter of vanity - I'm not bitching about too much foam on my latte. This is about functionality. Being female shouldn't be - WILL NOT BE - a hindrance to me getting my shit done.